SUCCESS is a CHOICE

Any change, big or small, comes at a price.  Sometimes the price is time, sometimes it is patience, sometimes it is blood, sometimes it is sweat, sometimes it is tears, sometimes it is walking away, sometimes it is speaking up, sometimes it is staying quiet.   If we can agree on anything, it should be that any change requires something because it isn’t what comes naturallyor by habit.  Hence the name alone, change.  

That is why a change is hard, it is scary.  It isn’t our normal way of doing or thinking.  It is something that we wish to do differently.  In other words, it is a decision.  And realizing this gives us control of our situations, decisions, and goals.  It also makes it where only we are in control of the results of our life.  Now is where I may have lost you…    Circumstances are created in your own mind.  So, before you can ever expect to make long term goals and changes, we must first to a little work to strengthen our minds.  This is the most difficult part of the process, but once you retrain your thoughts (which is a never-ending process of self-reflection, realignment, and continual development), you are unstoppable.  GREAT NEWS!!   YOU ARE IN CONTROL OF YOU!!  

As one of my favorite podcast personality/life coach instructor Brooke Castillo has said many times (seriously, check her out!  thelifecoachschool.com/podcast/262/)

You must be able to distinguish facts versus circumstances—

Do you believe, really believe?  Do you WANT to believe this? Choose to believe that you are in control in what you create 100% of the time.

Your thoughts create your feelings

Your feelings drive your action

Your actions create the results

You are fully in control—do you know your desired results, do you live it every day, through every choice?

Do the thing that seems impossible to everyone else, because your power doesn’t come from them, it comes from YOU believing in YOU.  

“If you believe with all your heart that all you have to do is believe your goals into being you wouldn’t indulge any thought that didn’t support you, you would stay committed and faithful to that result no matter what.  You would watch your brain try pulling you away and you would come right back, and you would practice.  You will create your own reality”

Brooke Castillo  #thelifeschool  #brookecastillo

 

Why do I quote her?  Because I believe it.  Those words line up with every goal that I have ever accomplished.  I joke with my friends that I am an “All or nothing gal.”  Meaning, I must first make decisions (Commit) for myself and only then I will be 100% on board, but once committed, I WILL accomplish it.   Sowhat has this made me realize about myself?  

*I don’t make commitments and goals half-heartedly

*I am a bit extreme in other’s eyes when they aren’t aligned with my goals

*Goals must be set by me, for me. PERIOD

I understand the struggle of setting goals and reaching them.  The best part of my 20s were spent training my mind.  I was the victim of circumstance in my teens and early 20s.  I was miserable.  I was constantly trying to be “skinny” trying to be “pretty” trying to be “smart” trying anything and everything to be noticed, to be accepted, to be liked.   But I didn’t like me…    If I didn’t like me, then why should anyone else?  It wasn’t that I wasn’t genuine when it came to friendships, it was more that I just wanted a shot at a friendship.  But those lies that I told myself, that I was taught my entire life through good old Southern values, from the media, to my interpretation of others were all created in my head and only I had the ability to change my way of thinking.   I wish now that I had some pretty awesome podcasts to help me realize these things, but honestly,I was late teens early 20s, which means we all know that I even had I “listened” I wouldn’t have HEARD them.  Why?  Because we evolve, and some messages can only be heard when it is the correct time in our lives.   I say all of this because I want to show that a transformation, at times, begins years before anyone else can see or feel the results.

 

The reason I am sharing this before really any other blogs?   I want to paint the picture of my journey, my why, my how…  I want you to realize that greatness isn’t overnight.  Success isn’t because you make 1 correct choice, it is a multitude of correct choices.   It is also a multitude of missteps, but missteps aren’t failure, and you can’t believe like that.  With each decision, you are literally realigning yourself with your goals.  And over time your goal may change, and that is okay—as long as those changes are FOR YOU, and you OWN that YOU made that DECISION.  (You do not get the right to play the victim because you allowed someone to change your goal—that was your decision).   

What do I mean by that?

“I was trying to lose weight because my boyfriend doesn’t find me attractive, but it was too hard because my best friends keep bringing me a cookies.  She sabotages me!  Because of her, he doesn’t love me”  (extreme I know, but points are made by the extreme)  1st—love isn’t contingent.  If it is, the it isn’t love.  2nd—You friend is allowed anything she wants.  These aren’t her goals.  I would hope that friends would support your goals, but you must first communicate those goals and ask for support. (And a fierce support team that is encouraging and holds you accountable is a legit boost to you accomplishing any goal.)  3rd—eating those cookies is YOUR choice only.  4th—having those in your life that don’t support you is YOUR decision.  All of those are hard contributors, and we know that failure is more likely in those types of environments.   But what I want to point out the most—GOALS MUST BE YOUR DECISION, THEY MUST BE FOR YOU…  IF THEY ARE FOR SOMEONE ELSE, THEY WILL NEVER BE ACHIEVED (at least not for the long term— examples:  kids trying to please their parents by getting into some elite program, trying out for the team because your dad played, giving up drinking, giving up smoking, waking up early to exercise… You will only achieve long term success of these when YOU want it for YOU.)

Hardest part we face is believing in ourselves, traces of doubt come from a history of not achieving goals. So, my question to you— Do you really WANT this, do you BELIEVE that youthoughts control your feelings, do you realize you will have to change the voice in your head so that it supports your goals and creates action?   Once you have that part down…    then, and only then can you be set up for success!  Now it is time to decide goals!

Do the thing that seems impossible to everyone else, because your power doesn’t come from them, it comes from YOU believing in YOU.  

As I post more blogs or how to videos please know this is where I started my journey from.  I am not trying to point out what I do good or right.  My website is something that I want to do for me.  It is something that I want to build on to make my hobbies more than something that sits in my closets.  It is a way for me to reach out to others and offer support or a different opinion to consider.  Who I am didn’t happen overnight, which is true for everyone.  We are the results of years and years of experiences, thoughts, and development.   All I am asking is that YOU believe in YOU, and that YOU choose YOU.   Because as you become more, those around you benefit and become more by being influenced by someone AMAZING.  You were made to be amazing, but only you can actually do it.

Think it, align it, do it..

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